Correcting Your Behavior Since 2017

December 11, 2017

Here we are again friends, still resolutely clinging to time-honored standards of accuracy and propriety in a nation gone mad with rule breaking. Everywhere one looks, violations a...

December 4, 2017

If you've immigrated to the United States without knowing much about your new home, you might be puzzled about which political party is the best one for you. As an equal-opportunit...

November 27, 2017

It never fails. Just as you've mastered the latest version of your now-necessary technology, the company that makes it triumphantly announces an updated version—an "improvement." I...

November 20, 2017

Hello again, fellow curmudgeons. It's been a while since I shared gems from my vast collection of damning photographic evidence of linguistic atrocities. We're overdue. And this ti...

November 13, 2017

Greetings, fellow grouches. This week, I welcome my very first guest curmudgeon, author Thomas H. Keels, who has a bone to pick. I wholeheartedly support his umbrage.

Recently, my h...

November 6, 2017

As a public service to those men out there who are attempting to hide their hair loss with some sort of fakery, I offer this helpful tip: it isn't working.

Friend, each morning when...

October 30, 2017

The Curmudgeon does a lot of traveling by air. (Spreading the word on what everyone is doing wrong is a full-time job lately—busy, busy, busy.) As we all know, air travel has chang...

October 23, 2017

Tools aren't interchangeable. Ask anyone who works with his hands. Artists use different brushes to achieve different effects. Each brush has a specialty. Use a rigger or a fan to...

October 16, 2017

All right, Curmudgeonites. I'm going to try to lay this out calmly . . . though I don't expect to succeed. This is how it works: When adults make appointments together, they each t...

October 9, 2017

Note: for the next installment of the Our Declining Language series, the Curmudgeon plans to compile a collection of misspellings found on restaurant menus. And I'm welcoming reade...

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