A Curmudgeon Rerun: The Eternal, Indisputable, Absolutely Non-Negotiable Rules of Theatre Attendance
Happy Monday, all. Here's another repeat appearance of one of my favorite pieces from last year. Not to worry, I have plenty of new axes...
A Curmudgeon Rerun: Nothing Left to Eat
Once again, a busier-than-usual schedule has led me to re-run one of my favorite columns from last year. For newcomers to this blog, this...
A Curmudgeon Rerun: UnAmerican Cheese
The Curmudgeon is busier than usual, so I've decided to re-run one of my favorite columns from last year for those of you who hadn't yet...
Crappy New Year
Well, dear readers, by some unforeseen miracle, we've managed to drag ourselves—scarred, singed, bruised, bitter, and utterly...
Crappy Holidays
There's an inherent dishonesty in the agonizing stretch of time we Americans call "the holidays." It starts with Thanksgiving, a day...
Rest Wrestle
I sigh in despair as I begin this week's re-enlightenment, because once again, it's difficult to believe I have to explain such things....
Our Declining Language (part 9 in an endless series)
Here we are again friends, still resolutely clinging to time-honored standards of accuracy and propriety in a nation gone mad with rule...
Going to a Party
If you've immigrated to the United States without knowing much about your new home, you might be puzzled about which political party is...
Down with Updates
It never fails. Just as you've mastered the latest version of your now-necessary technology, the company that makes it triumphantly...
Our Declining Language (part 8 in an endless series)
Hello again, fellow curmudgeons. It's been a while since I shared gems from my vast collection of damning photographic evidence of...
GUEST CURMUDGEON: Mysteries of the Orient
Greetings, fellow grouches. This week, I welcome my very first guest curmudgeon, author Thomas H. Keels, who has a bone to pick. I...
Hair Apparent
As a public service to those men out there who are attempting to hide their hair loss with some sort of fakery, I offer this helpful tip:...
You're Welcome Already, Damn It.
The Curmudgeon does a lot of traveling by air. (Spreading the word on what everyone is doing wrong is a full-time job lately—busy, busy,...
Knowing Your "And" from Your Ampersand
Tools aren't interchangeable. Ask anyone who works with his hands. Artists use different brushes to achieve different effects. Each brush...
Don't Remind Me
All right, Curmudgeonites. I'm going to try to lay this out calmly . . . though I don't expect to succeed. This is how it works: When...
Our Declining Language (part 7 in an endless series)
Note: for the next installment of the Our Declining Language series, the Curmudgeon plans to compile a collection of misspellings found...
